Why is it that as a society we tend to look down on a stay at home mom or dad, but it is perfectly normal for both parents to work, so their kids can have the best of everything…..everything, but their parent’s time or guidance? I realize that in this economy, if we want to keep up with the Jones’, per say, that both parents have to work; but take a look around at our children. Is what they gain in material goods, worth what they lose in parental guidance love and safety? I realize that I’m walking a really fine line here, and probably a good percentage of you, would like to push me over the edge already, but think about it. Think about how much you learned at your mom/dad’s knee or even grandparents side, talking about things you didn’t realize were all that important at the time, that have stayed with you through out you life. We’re losing those times, that take place during casual chats that you have no way of scheduling into your busy day. You can’t really set a time aside for those casual observations about life; because they only work, when you’re both feeling quiet and comfortable with each other, and not trying to hurry and tell each other every thing that has happened since you’ve last seen each other. I won’t even mention all the lessons we learn by example. I don’t want my children ever thinking, their less important then some job I’m running off to every day; and why? To pay for one more vehicle, so we can squeeze in even more activities. Activities…………..what ever happened to life? Who is accountable for teaching our children values? Is it our over-worked, underpaid teacher’s responsibility? How are they going to teach their overcrowded classrooms, with males, females, and different cultures how unique and valuable each and every one of them is with so little time? Their job is to educate our children, not discipline them. Other than the very basics; how are they supposed to try and teach them family values that are different within each family? That doesn’t even take into consideration the difference of cultures, religions, and race. Does enrolling our children in after school activities such as sports, scouts, dance, etc., take the place of them knowing that when they have a problem, there is a parent actually at home they can talk to? Doesn’t anyone notice how stressed our children have become? I’m not putting down after school activities, but when they become so important that it interferes with time to study, time to play, time to just be….then I have a problem with it. Since when did sitting in front of a TV or a computer playing games for hours; become substitutes for physical healthy activity? I realize at this point that this is a relatively negative article, but we need to take some time and think about the direction that our child rearing trends are moving. I don’t believe that capital punishment should be allowed in schools, but there has to be some form of discipline to take its place. We have classrooms where kids are in charge, and the teachers can’t teach in that environment. They have to have the support of the parents. Having been a survivor child abuse I most certainly don’t believe in hurting or abusing a child but there has to be discipline in a home, rules, and the most important, respect for other people. Children can’t be expected to discipline themselves, they aren’t little adults, they are children, and should be allowed to be children. If children are not taught self control, fair play, self sacrifice, moral values, then we end up with adults, that know nothing of those concepts, who go on to conceive another generation of the same. Just as a quick example, what does it show our children about fair play and self control when at a child’s game the parents’ of two children get into a knock down, drag out fight over a referee call? If I need to say anymore than that, then you’ve missed the whole point of the article. It isn’t going to work if one or two families finally “get it”. We as a society need to get our act together. If we can put a man on the moon why is it so unreasonable to expect we can turn around this damaging trend of raising such a self-centered generation. Who instead of thinking that hard work, self-control, and patience is what makes a great nation, grow up with instant gratification to the point of expecting self-fulfillment as being a right, without any work on their own behalf? Then on the other hand, we have the over-achievers, who feel that if they do not achieve success as soon as they have planned on it, they will be total failures for the remainder of their lives. They have been pushed to be the best, have the best, by driven parents. I sincerely doubt that by your twenties, you can count yourself out or even profess to know for sure, what it is that you actually what for the rest of your life. I guess, what I’m hoping for, is maybe to take a step back or two, for the sake of our families and our future. Unplug your child from that video game or cell phone long enough to see if you even know who they are anymore. It is us, the parents, buying our children brand new cars, the brand name jeans, and the best of everything, that keeps pumping up the economy, to the point that having two income families becomes a necessity not a choice. It is us, the parents, who will have to come together to combat this trend. I was home most of the time during the time my kids were growing up. It wasn’t by choice however, I had become disabled. It was probably one of the best things that ever happened to my kids and me.. Not the fact that I got sick, but the fact that I was home. Now they are grown, they’ve told me many times, how glad they were I was home, how secure they felt always knowing they had someone to talk to. For that matter, a lot of their friends chose to come to our house after school. I can’t count the times, they would sit in a circle around my recliner, and we would talk about school, girlfriends or boyfriends, and dating There so many subjects, I can’t remember them all, but I do remember the feeling of being connected to what was going on with my kids. Until now, I didn’t realize how fortunate I was to be allowed into their inner world. They were and still are great kids, and although my own and those informally adopted, have scattered further away now they are older. They all know, that “mom” is still just a phone call away.