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18 Feb 2008 04:53:24 | Rachelle Disbennett-Lee, PhD
Although it may not seem true, if we think about it, we will
come to realize that there are always more nos than yeses. We
will be turned down more often than not. The good news is that
the more nos we get the more the yeses will increase. It is a
numbers game. The more often we ask the more our chances of
success increase.
If, just for fun, we took a jar and put a penny in it for every
no we received and took out a penny for every yes, we would
never empty the jar. The nos will far exceed the yeses. There is
of course one way to limit the number of nos one receives, and
that is to never ask. No comes from putting ourselves out there,
being brave and taking risks. The good news is that being brave
and taking risks usually doesn't call for any extra human
capabilities. It could be as simple as asking someone out on a
date or applying for a new job. A simple yes is easy, but most
likely not. It is never easy to stretch our comfort zone and
take the risk of being rejected. Thankfully, no one dies from
rejection, and no simply means next opportunity.
In an interview with actress Christina Applegate, she shares how
being a teen star actually made it more difficult to break into
adult acting. After ten years starring as Kelly Bundee on the
television sitcom "Married with Children," Applegate found it
difficult to land adult acting parts. "You give everything you
have and it's “No!. You hear no so many more times than yes.".
Fortunately, Applegate did not give up, and ten years after her
teen success, she has created a successful adult acting career.
For Applegate, as with the rest of us, no doesn't mean stop, it
means keep going. No is just one more hurdle closer to yes.
Although hearing no and receiving rejection isn't easy, it is a
part of life. We may never become totally comfortable with
rejection, and we can come to realize that no isn't a stopping
point. No is a sign that a new opportunity is around the corner.
No never means the end unless we want it to. It means that we
have to find a different way, look in a different direction, ask
someone else, or ask in a different way. I received 47 nos when
trying to find a publisher for my book. Had I stopped at any one
of those nos, I would have missed out on the 48th one that said
yes. No just means "next opportunity." Learn to take no in your
stride and whatever you do - don't take it personally. When
people say no, it doesn't mean anything about you, it is all
about them. They may not be interested. They might not
understand the opportunity, or even what you are offering, or
they simply may not be in a place to say yes. Whatever their
reason, don't let it become your excuse to stop.
Find someone who does see the value, apreciates what you have to
offer and has the ability and power to say yes.
About Author :
Coach Rachelle Disbennett-Lee, PhD, is a Certified Master Coach
specializing in working with business owners and professionals
in being more profitable and productive while staying sane and
balanced. Visit Coach Lee at her websites
http://www.coachlee.com and http://www.365daysofcoaching.com.
True Direction, Inc. Copyright >>> This article along with
byline attached may be freely republished
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