If you want to have respect, you have to demand it. One of the ways in which you can attract attention and respect, particularly in the work force, is by the use of effective communication skills. In short, you have to communicate with clarity.

If you are not accustomed to speaking with confidence and authority, the following tips may make you self-conscious. However, with practice, you can change your communication style. It can make a big difference in your work relationships... and in personal relationships, as well.

Make eye contact with the person(s) to whom you are communicating. Your eye contact need not be constant- in fact, you may unsettle the other person if you stare directly at them, for an extended period of time. However, at least, you should make eye contact intermittently when a person is speaking to you, to show that you are attentive. Likewise, make eye contact when you are discussing something of importance to another person, or group of persons, to show that you expect and demand their attention, as well.

Speak in a low and constant tone, with sufficient volume so that your audience can hear you. It is natural that when a woman becomes nervous, her voice raises, sometimes to the extent that she "squeaks" when she speaks. Fight the natural inclination by concentrating on keeping your voice low and steady, and speak from your diaphragm, rather than your throat.

Consider your audience when you're selecting the words you use. In other words, if you are speaking to a superior at work, use formal language. If you are having a conference with your colleagues or you're speaking at your children's school function, use words that are appropriate for the event.

Slow down the pace of your speaking. Most women, in a tense situation, speed up the pace of their speaking. However, if you are facing an antagonistic audience, it's important to slow your speech. This is so for a variety of reasons, including the fact that by speaking slowly, you will have time to fully consider the import of your words. If you start speaking very quickly, words may come out of your mouth... that you will shortly regret. As well, slow and steady speaking allows an audience to concentrate on your words. Furthermore, it will help you to be regarded as an authoritative speaker.

How is your posture? If your shoulders are slumped, and your head is forward, not only are you obscuring your voice but you also appear to be have "given up" on the position you are advocating. Roll the shoulders back, lengthen your spine and keep your head up, as if a string in the middle is pulling it up to the sky. Some forms of exercise are especially designed to improve posture, such as yoga or Pilates. In any event, make a conscious effort to improve your posture when you are interacting with others and you want to be regarded with respect.

If you need to make a speech, for example at a conference, practice before-hand. You may feel silly speaking to yourself in front of your mirror, but you will be more relaxed when the "real event" occurs.

Some women tend to need to "break up" bad news or a tense relationship with nervous giggles. This is a habit which is understandable - however, it needs to get broken!

If you want to practice your practice public speaking skills in a group environment, you can join a club, such as Toastmasters International.

Finally, before you convince others that you are a strong communicator, you need to convince yourself. Do what you need to do, in order to gain your own self-confidence, because if you don't believe in yourself, nobody else will either! Therefore, make yourself a promise that you will be your own best advocate.