18 Feb 2008 04:53:04 | Nina Ham
/p>
MY CAREER IS IN THE DOLDRUMS…Do I need a Coach or a Therapist?
By Nina Ham
Is Monday the worst day of your week? Can you hardly remember
when you enjoyed going to work? Do friends ask why you seem so
down? Maybe this has been going on awhile, and you’re realizing
it’s time to do something. But where do you turn? At one moment
you tell yourself “It’s just my career…Change that, and
everything will be OK”. Another moment, you acknowledge you’re
living under a cloud and a lot of old emotional ghosts are
returning. Your friend who’s recommending you consult her
therapist may be right.
Your uncertainty is understandable. Work itself is never “just
work” but can reach deep into our attitudes toward us and into
our sense of belonging in the world. Furthermore, therapy and
coaching have much in common and differ primarily in the
emphasis each places on action and understanding. Whether you
decide to deal with your work issues through a practical
approach or a psychological approach is a matter of choice. The
questions posed below should help you make that choice.
•Are you an action person or an insight person? Most people are
both, in some mix, but instinctively approach change either by
setting it in motion with action or by first assessing and
preparing for its impact. A shy mid-level manager, for example,
who has taken on new responsibilities that involve public
speaking, may gravitate toward a Toastmasters group for help.
She would be a candidate for coaching if she wanted to develop
her mastery further. Or she might prefer to look toward therapy
as a setting in which she could explore her anxieties about
being in the spotlight.
•What’s your track record for converting personal desires and
dreams into real-time? Although all of us may have periods of
doubting whether we deserve work we love and are good at, being
able to sustain a commitment to having what you want is
essential for coaching. If you find yourself stuck in
daydreaming about the ideal career, or perhaps avoiding or
sabotaging efforts to create it for yourself, it may be that
you’re blocked by low self-esteem and/or depression. In this
case, therapy might be the better choice, to help you build a
positive investment in yourself.
•Holding your feet to the fire…too hot? In the process of
revitalizing your career, there’s plenty of research to be done:
research into yourself – who you are now and what you want – and
research into the marketplace. A therapist would accompany you
in researching yourself but would only indirectly participate in
your market research. Homework and accountability are generally
built into coaching, designed by you and your coach. Whether you
find accountability motivating and focusing, or unwelcome
pressure, should help inform your decision.
•Do you want an expert or a companion? A therapist will invite
you to go deeply into issues that may be blocking or confusing
you, and may draw on his or her expertise to challenge your
definition of the problem. A coach will invite you to co-create
the goals and design of the coaching, and your stated agenda
will be the focus unless you decide to change it. Both therapist
and coach will help you see what you can’t see, but you remain
more explicitly in charge of coaching than you would of therapy.
If you come to the conclusion that you want to look into
psychotherapy, it’s advisable to look for word-of-mouth
recommendations whenever possible. Another possibility is to
consult your local Mental Health Association. Many people find
it empowering to ask for sample visits with at least two
therapists before making their decision. If you decide on
coaching, be sure to inquire about training, in addition to
experience, as you’re looking for a coach. The International
Coaching Federation maintains a credential that assures the
client of a high level of both training and experience. And
remember, nothing precludes doing therapy and coaching
simultaneously. Some people find it very useful. Good luck on
your quest! Nina Ham is an ICF-certified business and career
coach and a licensed psychotherapist. Her company, Success from
the Inside Out, offers teleclasses and individual coaching for
people who want to grow themselves as they grow their business
or career. Visit her website at www.SuccessfromtheInsideOut.com
or subscribe to her E-Letter: Nina@womenssuccesscoach.com
About Author :
Nina Ham is an ICF-certified business and career coach and a
licensed psychotherapist. Her company, Success from the Inside
Out, offers teleclasses and individual coaching for people who
want to grow themselves as they grow their business or career.