18 Feb 2008 04:37:51 | Susan Dunn, MA Psychology, The EQ Coach
As we close the gap between physical, mental and emotional
health, realizing that they all influence one another, it’s
becoming more evident that attitude makes a difference. It isn’t
so much what’s happening, as how we feel about what’s happening.
I’m reminded of a visit to my obstetrician some years ago, when
pregnant with my second child and delighted. He told me how nice
it was to have someone so happy in his office. “49% of my
patients are pregnant and don’t want to be, and 49% aren’t
pregnant and want to be.” So, the same news delivered, you
should pardon the expression, brought different feelings.
You're probably aware that being optimistic and resilient can
help you with any task or challenge, but have you considered
gratitude? An attitude of gratitude?
When you're able to focus on the positive things going on and to
be grateful for them, it lessens stress and tension and helps
you do your work and be more pleasant and loving. It
accomplishes one very important thing: it keeps you from
dwelling on the things that are going wrong.
Have often have you focused on the one thing that went back
during a day and ignored all the many things that went well?
Here are some ways you could put this into action in your life.
·At work, suggest at meetings, or around the watering hole that
each person mention something that’s gone well that day.
·Start a journal yourself of things you’re grateful for each day.
·Suggest to your partner that when you get home at night, you’ll
each mention the good things that happened that day, before the
bad, along with the bad, or in place of the bad.
·Start training your children to talk about the good things that
have happened. When your child laments, “I didn’t do well on the
spelling test today,” ask them to name something they did do
well at. ·Have a regular time for the family to express
gratitude.
·Express your gratitude to the people at work who help you or
makes things run more smoothly.
But don’t stop with these ideas.
Discuss this concept with your colleagues, employees and family.
Ask them for suggestions. When we take part in the planning and
figure things out, we’re more invested.
No matter how “bad” you think your day has gone, there are
dozens of things that go well. Burning the dinner amounts to an
hour’s worth of time, while you successfully completed the
grocery-shopping, found a parking place, cleaned the kitchen,
found the perfect gift for your mother-in-law, read to the
children, and many other things.
You may have failed to get a donation from a certain donor, but
you engaged some new volunteers, organized your office filing
system, got a call from the press, got a grant accepted, and got
a compliment from your boss on how well things were going.
When we focus only on what goes wrong, we magnify it way out of
proportion. From the minute you wake up in the morning feeling
good and having a house and food on the table, to the time you
tuck the children in bed at night and crawl into the clean
sheets with your honey, there is much to be grateful for.
Focusing on the positive, and being grateful for what goes
right, feels good, works out, and succeeds can make your day go
a lot better – and possibly affect your health as well.
About Author :
©Susan Dunn, MA, The EQ Coach, http://www.susandunn.cc .
Coaching, distance learning, and ebooks around emotional
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