There is an excellent book on golf published in 2002, written by Joseph Parent called "Zen Golf". I've always felt everything starts on the inside and moves out, and golf is no different. This book is great resource for anyone wanting to take the inner journey to better golf, and for that matter to a better life.

Parent has a chapter in the book called "Unconditional Confidence". It made me think, and I wanted to share it with you now.

There are three kinds of confidence:

False Confidence - This is nothing more than talk with no real basis for being. It is easy for us to live in denial, not face what we really are, and endlessly talking ourselves up. This is a shallow state of being, wanting to impress others of a worth we most likely do not possess. Because of the falseness we take unrealistic chances and then we become easily disappointed with the results. Golf is a game that easily demands the truth, and no about of verbiage will change that truth on the golf course.

Conditional Confidence - This is result driven. I will be confident if the proper result is achieved. It is dependent "on the condition" that we play well, that our golf swing stays in tack. When life on the course is going nicely, it is easy to pump ourselves up and have a certain feeling of invincibility, thinking we can do wrong and make every shot.

But what happens when life on the course takes unexpected turn for the worse? We begin to question ourselves, doubt creeps into the mind, and the trip downhill has begun. We become worried, "What if..." and those doubts and worries turn to fear and produce that exact result we feared. We fulfill our own negative prophecy that is dialoguing internally in the mind.

Unconditional Confidence - Unconditional confidence takes place when the fragmentation of our inner selves become integrated and doubt, worry, and fear are removed. It is not result driven or based on how 'good' or 'bad' we strike a golf ball. Our worth as a person is not dependent on our performance on a golf course.

With unconditional confidence we see our experiences more as a whole and whatever may happen that may be deemed as 'negative' is temporary. Actually, we come to the realization that it is all temporary.

Instead of instantly assuming something is "wrong" when things go badly on the golf course, we have the quality of mind to question what may have interfered with the intention of the shot.

Can you see the difference?

Unconditional confidence originates from the inside, not the other way around. The other way around is the conditional confidence approach.

When our awareness is enlarged are perspective is sharpened. When life (on the golf course - or elsewhere) becomes difficult a sense of composure is maintained, which keeps us in balance. Difficulties are handled with a sense of humor with the realistic knowledge that everything comes and goes, the good and the bad.

Whatever life (or golf) may throw at us we can be fearless in whatever moment that may be.

That is the depth and expression of true confidence.

Stan Thomas has been playing golf since before dirt covered the earth. Privately you'll tell you Moses had a huge slice.

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