09 Mar 2008 03:50:23 | Pat Swan, MS, Life and Relationship Coach
Do you think marriage is a turkey shoot? Are you looking for a
guarantee of success? Don’t gamble with your relationship.
Follow expert advice to beat the odds for divorce.
Researchers can predict the success or failure of a long-term
relationship with 90% accuracy based on one thing - Conflict
Resolution Skills. All relationships experience problems. How
you handle them makes the difference.
Do you avoid discussing your differences? You build resentment
and destroy your relationship as surely as fighting does. Follow
these steps and solve differences safely, without fighting.
1.Set aside a time to sit down together, without distraction, to
discuss the specific difference of opinion you want to solve.
2.Define the problem to be solved.
Don’t jump into a power struggle. A difference of opinion is not
right or wrong, just different.
3.Brainstorm all of the possible solutions.
Think outside the box. Get creative. Write down all solutions.
Don’t eliminate possibilities for any reason, even if they are
“way out” or sound crazy. This makes it fun!
4.Discuss each suggestion.
Give pros and cons. Put a check by possibilities. Cross out ones
that are unrealistic or not acceptable to one of you. Consider
whether two or three can be combined to make a better option. Be
open to new ideas.
5.Choose an option that is acceptable to both of you.
Don’t say “yes” if you have reservations. You won’t follow
through.
6.Set a date a week or two into the future to sit down and
discuss how this solution is working.
Practice the solution during that time and note how it works.
7.Celebrate that your relationship is important enough to spend
the time to find a “win-win’ solution.
Now, forget your differences and have some fun!
About Author :
©Pat Swan, M.S., Life and Relationship Coach,
http://www.RelationshipSkillville.com . Pat is a speaker, coach,
and author of “Watch Out! Your Relationships Can Be Hazardous to
Your Health,” available at http://
www.StopRelationshipStress.com . Stop relationship stress and
discover secret remedies for better health.
Mailto:pat@patswan.com . PH: 262-642-5706.