08 Mar 2008 12:28:06 | Tim Mack
Did anyone ever notice that "Clap Your Hands" commercial on TV?
I'm just so glad its finaly off the air. I just couldn't watch
the commercial without cracking up.
It makes me laugh because of Singapore. One day I got into a cab
with two of my friends, and one of my friends had a bad
backache, so he told the Singapore Cab driver to take us
somewhere where you could get a good back rub.
So the driver takes us to this place thats way of the beaten
track, and then points at a staircase to go up. So we walk up
this staircase, and we see this Lady standing there, and there
is only one table.
She motions us to sit down, and then she brings us all a beer.
Then she stands next to the table and says. "What can I do for
you?"
My friend explains to her that. "The Cab driver said you could
get a good back rub here."
She smiles and says yes. "We have the best here."
Then she claps her hands and a curtain opens. The open curtain
reveals a whole bunch of women standing there in skimpy outfits.
My friend says. "No not that."
Then she claps her hands, and another curtain opens up revealing
more women in skimpy outfits.
Then my friend says. "My back aches, thats all, I have on my
mind."
Then she claps her hands again, and all the women behind curtain
number one start to take off their skimpy outfits.
My friend says. "No, just a back rub."
Then she claps her hands again, and all the women behind curtain
number two start taking all their skimpy outfits off.
Then I said to her. "You don't understand, my friend only came
here for a back rub."
Then she claps her hands again, and this totaly naked women
jumps up on the table and starts wrapping her thighs around my
neck.
I said. "No, back rub, just a back rub."
Then she claps her hands again. "And says okay back rub."
I said. "Yes, back rub."
Then she claps her hands again and the woman starts taking my
shirt off.
I started to say to her that. "Its my friend that wanted the
back rub and not me."
But I could see she was ready to clap her hands again. So, I
just said. "Okay." Affraid of what would happen next if she
claped her hands again.
So now this woman is giving me a back rub, and my friend says to
the Lady. "What about the two of us?
So of course she claps her hands again, and one woman rushes
over, and then she claps her hands again, and another woman
rushes over. Then the Lady claps again, and the woman that was
rubing my back walks away.
So, I'm thinking good. "The Lady has everything figured out at
last."
So I gulp down the rest of my beer, thinking that my friends
will just get their back rub now, and then we can get out of
this strange place.
But no, I was wrong. The Lady says to me. "Would you like
another beer?"
I said. "Thank you, but no, I'm fine."
Then the Lady says. "Come with me."
I said. "Come with you where?"
Then she says. "You have to get the second part of your back rub
now. But I need you to lay down for it."
I said. "Why do I need to lay down for a back rup?"
She gave me a strange look and said. "Why do you have to ask so
many questions?"
So then, she takes me into this room and points and says. "Lay
here on your stomach."
Then she claps her hands again and before I know it a bunch of
women are rubing their hands all over my back.
Then after a few minutes, the Lady says to me. "Turn over on
your back."
So, I turn over and then the women start pouring all this lotion
on me and then they start rubing up and down my chest. Then I
feel one of the women lift my arms and pull them back all the
way back behind my head. Then I feel some hands around my waist,
and then in a split second, I feel my pants and shorts come
sliding off.
Then I said. "No not this."
The Lady said. "Whats wrong?"
I said. "I don't want to have sex, just a back rub."
She says. "Okay no sex, but we can't do this with your clothes
on."
I said okay. "But no sex."
As I said the words no sex, I could then feel the women
spreading my legs wide apart. Then I felt the women spreading
the lotion and rubing it all up and down my thighs. Then the
women turned me over on my side and started to spread and rub
the lotion all over my buttocks.
Then I heard laughing. I asked. "What are they laughing at?"
Then the Lady said. "The butterfly, they're laughing at the
butterfly on your butt."
Then the Lady asked. "Why do you have a butterfly on your butt?"
I said. "I didn't think anyone would see it there."
She kept her promise, there was no sex, but was that ever one
heck of a rub down. I just couldn't figure why they needed so
many women to do the job.
When we walked out of the place at last.
I asked my friends. "Did the two of you have the same kind of
rub down?"
They both replied. "No, just our backs."
I said. "I don't get it. Why would that Lady have the women do
all that to me, and only have the women rub your backs?"
One of my friends smiled and said. "She just wanted to see you
with your clothes off."
Then my other friend said. "Yeah, I think that Lady had the hots
for you."
I guess I will really never know the real answer to that
question, but whatever the reason, it was a great rub down. But
I will always think of that Lady in Singapore if I see someone
claping their hands a lot."
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This segement taken from Tiffany Stone. http://www.freewebs.com/episodesofjacques/tiffanystone.htm