08 Mar 2008 12:28:06 | Susan Dunn, MA, Midlife Coach
It’s no wonder so many people of all ages are turning to
dancing. It kills two birds with one stone: it’s a great way to
meet members of the opposite sex and new friends, and it offers
exercise, one of the antidotes to depression with or without
therapy, with or without medication.
If you know you should be exercising more and just can’t drag
yourself out of bed an hour earlier in the morning to go jogging
in the freezing cold, or can’t find tennis and racquetball
partners, dancing’s an option you need to consider. It requires
no partner, no special equipment, costs little, happens after
work hours, and you probably have something appropriate to wear
already in your closet.
Many dance halls now offer free or nearly-free group dance
lessons and there are dancing studios cropping up all over the
country where you can get individual and group lessons.
Typically the dance teacher in the private school tries to
balance the ratio of men to women (arguably the hardest part of
the job), and encourages changing partners, partly to increase
your leading and following skills, and partly so you can develop
the social skills of dancing – where to look, what to say, how
to invite someone to dance with you, and how to decline
politely.
They also may fill in with dance assistants who are learning how
to teach and want the practice. “You don’t need to have a
partner,” they advertise. Singles are welcome, often
outnumbering the partnered, and there’s likely to be a wide age
range, skewed slightly on the older side. How sweet it that?
The private dance studio may also offer social outings and field
trips to other dance halls which will extend your knowledge of
what’s available and also bring you new acquaintances and dance
partners.
And a nod to the future? Many schools offer training for your
first wedding dance. It’s a big moment when the bride and groom
take the floor, and they will teach you how to make it look and
feel good.
If you’re a man, you can also use this training to allow you to
become a Gentleman Dance Host on cruise ships, including the
coveted Cunard line. These gentleman, who are older and have
good social and dance skills, are on duty every night in the
various lounges of the ship dancing with women in need of
dancing partners, as part of their working vacation. For more
information on this, see my ebook, “Presenting on a Cruise.”
Country and Western dance halls, Salsa Clubs and Big Band
Ballrooms are filling empty nights (weeknights and Sundays) by
offering group lessons you can take advantage of. They usually
have a male and a female teacher, so you can see what it looks
like when you actually dance with someone.
You can learn the Triple Two Step, Salsa, Merengue, West Coast
Swing and the new line dances, as well as the traditional
ballroom dances like the waltz and polka. My dance school is
having a Polka Party this Sunday afternoon. 2 hours of
instruction followed by open dancing. Can you imagine the
exercise?
Check with the dance halls in your area, or go here to locate a
dance teacher:
http://www.dancespots.net/Find/FindATeacher.asp?SE=Y. This
website needs more names and numbers (there were none listed for
my zip code, while there are many opportunities in this town),
so if your dance school or teacher isn’t listed there, call and
tell him or her to get on this website. It provides needed
information.
Once you get into it you may not want to stop with purely social
dancing. More people all the time are recognizing the fun and
physical fitness aspects and want to get more serious about it.
For this you need a steady partner to practice and compete with
and there’s even a website for finding a dance partner:
http://www.dancepartner.com/?AC=1 .
If you really get into it, you’ll also need wardrobe. Matching
Western shirts for you and him? (Buy it and he will come!) I
can’t imagine dancing the tango without a ruffled skirt, can
you? (The rose in your teeth is optional!) If you don’t want to
spend a fortune to outfit yourself, take a trip to your local
Goodwill store. They may have just what you’re looking for,
including cowboy boots.
How to begin? Find the place, check out the dress code, and show
up. You may be a little nervous at first, depending upon how
rusty you are, and especially if you’re a true beginner, but
don’t worry, you’ll soon be out there doing the Jitterbug with
the best of them. The teachers and atmosphere will make you feel
at ease immediately, and chances are you’ll find nice people who
are there to enjoy dancing in a friendly, healthy atmosphere
that’s contagious.
Once you’ve learned the basics and found the venues, you can add
dancing to your social schedule. What better way to work off
that Thanksgiving dinner than to go dance the night away
afterwards?
Dancing makes a great family activity. There are at least two
dance halls in my town that offer special family-friendly times.
They offer food as well as drink, and it’s sweet to see the dads
dancing with their little girls in their arms, and toddlers
taking the floor solo to bounce to the beat.
There’s also a chance to dance at local festivals. The recent
Wurstfest in my area featured a huge dance floor with a 10-piece
brass band imported from Germany that got everyone up and on
their feet – from 18 months to 80.
As more people stay single for extended periods of time, line
dancing is being offered more frequently. If you don’t have a
partner, or just don’t want to dance with someone you don’t
know, you can wait till they play Cotton Eyed Joe, Mambo No. 5,
Strokin’ or Boot Scootin’ Boogie and get out there on your own.
But you’ll have the most fun if you go ahead and ask someone to
dance, and ladies, don’t be shy. It’s quite acceptable to ask
men to dance. In fact I think the guys appreciate it.
Whatever your goal, looking for friends or a partner, wanting to
master new dances, or simply to get exercise and have fun, you
can’t go wrong. It’s highly probable you’ll find all these when
you go out dancing.
About Author :
©Susan Dunn, MA, Midlife Dating and Relationship Coach,
http://www.susandunn.cc . Offering coaching for men and women in
dating, transitions, retirement and other midlife issues. Susan
is the author of “Midlife Dating Survival Manual for Women,”
available at www.webstrategies.cc/ebooklibrary.html .
Mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc .